Hello again, my fellow bloggers. Things go well, Jenny was here today; and I'm already enjoying myself. Things are going as I've hoped. Something was kind of funny. Normally, I spend my time in class chatting with Jenny, but since she wasn't here yesterday, I went to the computer, posted a message, as well as read some of my favorites.

When school was about out, I went back to my classroom as you're supposed to. Upon returning back to my classroom, Chris watched me and walked up. He said, “Okay, you and Jenny, surely there is SOMETHING going on between you two…” For another rare time in my life, I was as open with my speech as I am in the blog.

I said, “Chris, if you really want to know the truth, yes, I do like her. But right now she's with somebody, so I'm just having fun.” He said, “So, what about her boyfriend?” I replied, “They've been with each other for two years. It's a pretty unrealistic thought to think that I will easily boot him from his place. Anyway, I'm having fun, and there is little doubt in my mind that she feels the same. If it works, it works, if it doesn't it doesn't.”

The funny thing is that anyone reading this blog knows how obsessive I am over this, and how in reality I see it as nothing to that easily shrug off. But I did tell Chris, and it was very comforting that no misfortune has come about because of it. I just don't see how people could try to wreck love between people so easily…It took me forever to decide that pursuing Jenny was what I wanted to do, and even when I came to that conclusion, I see it as a grey in a world of white is good and black is evil. This is a very color-blind situation. Love, what a pesky, useless emotion…

The funniest thing about this situation is that by no means should this guy care about what's going on in my life. I know little more about him than his name. He knows nothing of Jenny but her name. We can say the same for both of us, but that didn't matter to him. It was conflict, and he wanted his piece, not that anyone, (Even I) would blame him.

I guess some people just can't get enough of it. Is Conflict really Humanity's driving force? I've always jokingly said that “Nobody goes to a movie that's about someone who has a good day. Why; because we (people) want to see death, violence, and destruction!” (AKA Conflict)

The more I watch people the more I see that, that is the case. My life is chopped full of conflict. I have enough conflict for three or five more people. I guess just some people can't get enough. My only wish is that he could see what rock he threw at a hornet's nest that I like to call my love life. I wasn't mad at him; in fact it brightened my day knowing that people knew. That everything was obvious, including Anthony Casimire.
Yes, it brought comfort to also know that it wasn't, “Do YOU, like her” or do “YOU have something going on…” It was “There's at least something going on BETWEEN YOU TWO.” And that was a terribly comforting thought. Something that's kind of funny is the fact that, do remember when I stated that, “It turns out that we have another class with each other?”

Well, I remembered that I have the same teacher for Government this year as I did for American History last year. The funny thing is; I hated this teacher. We're talking animosity here. I had plenty of time to re-schedule. (A whole semester) but I didn't. Every time I thought, “I need to get that done before it's too late…” my mind would whisper to me, “Just don't do it. This year, it will be fine.” Sure enough, I listened to my mind, for it rarely steers me wrong. Sure enough here I am, sharing a class with Jenny being taught by a teacher that literally repulses me.

The odds are literally astounding: same hour, same teacher, and same classroom in a school of approximately 2750. Before you think, “Wow, that's kind creepy,” I will tell you, do not envy anyone with a powerful mind's eye. If you don't have it; good. If someone you know has it, don't envy them. If you don't believe in it better. If you don't want it, GREAT! It is a curse…Trust me. Anyhow, I've thrown in my blog for the day, and I'm going to sign off for the time being. This is Anthony Casimire signing off.

Why hello there all my fellow Bloggers. I was heavily anticipating today but as I entered my third hour class to let the game begin, so to speak…She’s not here. Anyhow, today was a pretty good day anyway.

I don’t have to work much at all; I only work eighteen hours this week. If it’s like this next week, I’ll ask if I can do expo…they’re always busy. Since this Restaurant opened towards the beginning of December, we’ve been really, really busy. Not only did we have those Christmas shoppers, but we also had all the people eager to try the new place in town. It was a few bars short of a nightmare. So, I’m just going to take this week with ease. It’s nice to sit in the sun and bask in my recent success. (By the way, not only is this metaphorical, because the weather here has been nothing short of magnificent.)

If my friend has off, we’ll probably go to this down town coffee shop called Dioko and I’ll read some things for the “Open mike night.” Our town has a lot of budding bards. So, it seems like I get to fall asleep another night just waiting for this semi-climactic moment to follow through. The time that I again; get to make a fool of myself over Jenny.

It’s kind of funny…I have gotten the biggest kick out of watching me morph my way through this. The aspect of watching me do this is almost as fun as if I were really living the relationship. I hope things go well, but I’ve posted enough for one day and really haven’t much to say so good day to you all.

Your faithful servant
Anthony Casimire

This is my Senior Picture, 05. I'll try to get newer ones in soon!

Well, Hello my fellow bloggers. I’m doing well, but heavily waiting Monday. Right now, I have been giddy all day. I haven’t been feeling like myself at all, all day. And for that, I am very grateful. Right now, I’m taking a break from writing my story and taking the time to express myself and what I’m thinking.

I’m so glad that I have to work this night that it isn’t even funny! My night will be occupied, and I’ll be getting paid for it! Talk about having the good end. I’ve also been listening to my favorite bands, Incubus and Blind Guardian. Their songs have been in my head, and they express what I feel. Incubus, in particular…

There are several songs that sing about what I’m feeling. Here are a few lines.

“To see you when I wake up is a gift; I didn’t think could be real. To know that you feel the same as I do; is a three-fold utopian dream. You do something to me that I can’t explain. So would I be out of line if I said I miss you? I see your picture I smell your skin on the empty pillow next to mine. You have only been gone for ten days, but already I’m wasting away… I know I’ll see you again, with some fuck or two, but I want you to know that I care… and I miss you…”

Another good one:

“Thirteen minutes till six and fourteen floors to go, thirteen suited strangers make a crowded elevator slow. And I’ve got a million words and phrases on the tip of my tongue for the only non stranger next to me, soon she’ll know… Know, know… (Chorus: Multi singers, too hard to understand.)

Twelve more floors your eyes and mine, are all I need to come clean, should I wait for the levies and the lies, of twenty six nervous eyes. Within I argue by the list of numbers passing by if I wait one minute longer I think I will die…die, die, (Chorus)

You’ve helped me to feel, see and know, all the while I’ve been so inquisitive I can’t go back now because now I know how it feels to open up and breathe… (Chorus)”

Good songs!

So yeah, I’ve just been chilling so to speak. Something that disappoints me is some of my favorite bloggers are considering leaving the stream. I definitely understand the need to just rant or vent things out. I feel more like I’m telling a story how as it goes. So I expect to be operating here for many years to come. Maybe I’ll publish it and make a lot of money someday!

My hits have been going through the roof! I’m used to like an average of 4 or 5 new visitors a day, but one day I went from 292 to 313. It’s a very humbling as well as amusing thought. We are but stories, and when I retire, I expect that I’ll go through everyone’s blog that I can. I love to read the about the lives of normal and not-so-normal people. You hear about heroes and villains 24-7 but you never here about Ashley, Elizabeth, Sarah, or Bob or Joe, Walt or Steve; all these random people that live here and there.

It’s crazy to think that “Black Books” exist everywhere. Here my blog is, mostly about my dysfunctional family, and lack of love, until recently. To think that there’s someone in Iran, or Cuba, Japan, and all over the world, Black books are being written and liven, but nobody knows. Where in this nation, in reality things are so much less complicated; there’s probably some person in the Middle East, facing the same problems, only his family can kill him for voicing out his thoughts for ‘disgracing’ them.

In the world, 6 billion Black Books are being carried by its inhabitants. In the past, billions of billions of Black Books have eroded into nothing. I hope in the afterlife, we are given access to this Great Library of human thought. Think of all the things people could learn from these books…

People…we must be interesting to watch. I know I am getting the biggest kick out of watching this thing with Jenny bloom. I mean, I’m not sure if I’m going anywhere, but it’s a pleasant thing to think. I know that I’m going to ask her to prom, but if she’s still with this guy of hers, I would completely understand her not going. That’ll be her choice, so I might as well not worry about it.

See, like I said that Jenny has been with this guy for two years, they met when she was a sophomore and he a senior. So he’s about two years older than us. I wouldn’t blame him or her for saying, “No can do.” In fact, if I were in his shoes, I probably would’ve busted my own face in by this time… But regardless, there’s compatibility, friendship, and interest, the foundations of relationships. This is Jenny’s boat, and I’m a wind. If she wants to come my way, she knows where the helm is. I’m just encouraging her to give it a nudge in my direction.

I used to be afraid of infringing my way into relationships, but it’s been so long since I’ve felt that warmth, and when you’ve got people tossing out people this way in that claiming that there are “Better Fish” out there, or those who don’t seem to see any point in devotion. Ones (My) interest seems to make a “Treasure” out of someone else’s “Trash” If he treats her right, I’ll know that Jenny will feel devoted enough to say no to me, thus reassuring me that he does love her. If she’s interested in me, it’s more than likely that she’s not being fulfilled; and that’s his fault, not mine.

I guess I could justify myself and my actions all day with weird philosophies like that. People like to be Just…in the “Right” so to speak. I think it’s kind of funny. People are always seemingly so busy trying to keep up their REPUTATIONS that they often ignore the REALITY of the situation. I think it’s odd. I’m thinking, “You do realize that if you fixed your leaks instead of trying to hide them, you wouldn’t have so many leaks in the first place, thus action, not words is how to solve your problem…

Regardless, it is vain to pursue perfection, because perfection something people messed up on a long time ago. I just find that the best way to live free is to just be yourself…uncovered, uncensored, un-bias, and honest. What’s someone going to do? Call you a crappy person. I assure you that I’ve never been responsible for the genocide, I’ve never flown a plane into a building, and I’ve never invaded a neutral country. I’m sure 9 out of 10 people on this site can say the same. People all over the world are trying to pull it off on a daily basis, so chin up, and take comfort in the fact that you haven’t been responsible for the death of hundreds of people.

(I told you I was feeling much better!) Anyway, it’s almost time for me to get ready for work, and I have little more to say, so until next time, this is Anthony Casimire signing off.

Tonight is my entry for Saturday, but you won’t get to see it until Monday. Don’t worry; I have full intentions of getting the internet when I move out. Now, internet is one of those prohibited things of the house for obvious reasons.

Anyway, I’d like to thank all my readers for the continuing support. I TRY to get around to reading other people’s blogs, but usually…Always, I have very little access time being that I do school and all that jazz. I definitely took it as major compliment to be told that I write like a college student, but I admit, I have vocabulary, alright, but I couldn’t spell to save my life. That’s one of the many reasons I cut and paste my articles.

It’s kind of amusing, I’ve been writing for a long time, not realizing that so many people read, much less took the trouble to back track. I can’t help but wonder what people get out of it…Empathy, a good laugh or just hearing the rants of someone who lives in a Vacuum? (Haha, it’s really not bad, just so lonely that it gets irritating.)

Just to let you know, I’m watching my flower dance to techno, its VERY Amusing. Did I mention my dancing flower? I think I did. I’m going to have pictures VERY soon, at least my senior picture. My hair has been grown out quite a bit, but I’ll get more pictures that are more up to date.

Today, I spent most of it coming up with good ways to harass/flirt with Jenny. I’m getting her a little gift. She LOVES Mr. Pibb, so I got her a liter of it with a cap that I got. It’s small, I know, but it IS the thought as well as the thoughts it provokes that count! (HAHA!) By I’m not going to get all psychological about this, I’m in love, and I love every minute of it. It’s good to have something to look forward too, even if it’s smooching on a taken girl…

I did a lot of driving, next opportunity the license office has drivers test, and I’m going to shoot for it again. It would be nice if I could get my hands on wheels, not to mention A LOT easier to take Jenny places of future interest! I find myself longing for the arrival of Monday. It’s ridiculous, I know, but I do have something to look forward too.

Work went well tonight. A Jr. Manager and I had a brief exchange of words. After my break, I got back, there was an order for three Chicken tender meals and there were no tenders. They take a while to cook, and he was being an ass about it and I told him, “I just got back a few seconds ago, so if anyone needs to be bitched at, it’s the people that took over while I was gone!”

I didn’t get in trouble, but I hate being thought of as the demi-god of the fryer. I don’t have a true effect on how the station works until I’ve been there long enough to do that. When you’re dropping, selling, and picking up slack, it’s like making a treadmill go from speed one to ten without a transitional phase. The friction and the recoil cannot be helped. I’m not saying that I haven’t made goofs, but it just gets frustrating when people expect you to defy the laws of corporate physics and do it for minimum wage.

Considering that we are the first store in the history of the company to make $10,000 PROFIT in the first two weeks of business, I think those managers don’t or shouldn’t have much to gripe about. Actually, the managers are pretty easy-going. It’s the shift ones that like to be a pain in the ass. They’ve got a little taste of power, and it makes them obnoxious. It’s like the puberty of business management I guess.

Reading back, I realize just how guttered my mind is. How do I find such creative harsh things to say? Do I subconsciously cook up such cynical things to say; because I’m not this mean in reality… Anyway, continue the wish me luck, pray, or whatever you like to do when you have hope for a friend; regarding my situation with Jenny. It’s feeling really good. I think I might be finally getting somewhere. I appreciate your encouragement and comments. Thank you, readers! Prisonerofhope Especially!